Who Needs Katniss When You Can Have Peeta?
by The Amazing Steve
Summary: Gale and Katniss get married, but Gale cheats on her with...Peeta!


_Peeta's point of view_

"Katniss, I love you," I said, bending down on one knee. This was the moment I was waiting for my whole life. Katniss has been the love of my life for years, and I finally got her a ring to show her this. Hands shaking, I pulled it out, grasping her hand tightly. "Will you marry me?"

Just the look in her eyes shattered my heart. The disgust written across her face made me wish I never decided to go through with this. "I'm sorry, Peeta," she said, "but weddings are stupid. I'm never getting married." Shaking her hand free from mine, Katniss stood up and walked away from me; it was almost as if she couldn't get away from me fast enough. I just sat there, watching the only person I ever cared about run away from me.

***Two Weeks Later***

I waited for her to be alone so I could have a talk with her. Even though I love Katniss, I practically shook with anger because of her – and Gale. They decided to get married, when Katniss specifically said "Weddings are stupid. I'm never getting married." Soon, some random dude finally walked away from congratulating her. Then, I decided to make my move.

"Hey, Katniss!" I called to her. She stopped, slightly rolled her eyes, then strolled over to where I was standing.

"What do _you_ want?" Katniss snapped.

"What is this? I thought you said you were never getting married."

"I lied. I only said that to get out of that horrible situation. So what? Grow some balls and deal with it."

"Gosh, you're pretty cranky today. What's been in your pants?"

"Gale has. He's actually pretty good, too."

"WHAT?"

"You heard me. Gale has been in my pants. I have been in his. And he is amazing. Deal with it." I stood there, gaping at her. My mind just couldn't process those words. After a moment of silence, she added, "Why are you even hear, anyway? No one invited you! In fact, just go away. Just get out of my life." Once again, she stormed away from me.

I was ready to cry, when Gale decides to say, "Dude, stay away from my wife." Hearing this put a thought in my mind: if I befriend Gale, that would bring me closer to Katniss, right?

***The Next Day***

_Gale's point of view_

A violent knocking at the door broke us apart. "No, don't leave me, baby," my wife told me. "I want you."

I agreed, going faster and faster, groaning in pleasure as I heard her screams. After hearing another knocking, I finally slowed down, then came to a stop. Katniss's moaning died down, followed by a lazy glance at the clock. "Holy crap!" she yelled, leaping off the bed and redressing.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Oh, umm… it's just that … I wanted to surprise you, but I'm kinda late now…"

"I'm sorry. It's all my fault, isn't it? I wanted you so bad, I distracted you – "

"No, it's ok. I'll just go now. I love you." Katniss leaned in, kissing me so passionately that I almost dragged her back to the bed.

"I love you too," I said between kisses. Another rapid pounding came from the door. We broke apart, Katniss going out the back door, and I putting my clothes back on. Finally, I answered the door.

"Oh, it's you." Peeta stood there holding a basket on my front step. Wonderful. "What do you want?"

"I just wanted to congratulate you on your marriage," he said, shifting nervously. "Here's a gift."

His outstretched hands held the basket – full of bread, of course. How original.

I sighed. "Bread? Really? That's the best you can do?" Sighing and rolling my eyes at his apologetic smile, I snatched the gift from his hands. "Look, if you're looking for Katniss, she's not here. Even if she were here, I don't think that she would want to talk to you."

"I know, I'm sorry about what happened yesterday. I just got a little jealous. I'm over her now, anyway." Peeta paused, obviously trying to come up with something to say, hoping to erase his mistakes. I waited for him to continue – only to mock him, laugh, and slam the door in his face.

But what he finally said surprised me: "So… you wanna go hunting? I brought a knife in case you said yes."

Startled, I listened to myself as I replied, "Sure. Why not?"

***In The Woods***

_Peeta's point of view_

We walked around in the woods in silence for what seemed like a lifetime. I still could not believe how stupid Gale was. Did he really think I wanted to make peace? Yeah right! Pretty soon, Katniss would see us as friends, then start to treat me as her friend, and then I could get her alone, drunk, and start tearing off her clothes as we're making out…

Stupid Gale interrupted my thoughts. "Sooo…" Nice job. Breaking the silence like that. Since he obviously wanted to make conversation, I racked my brain for something to say.

"Sooo…" I repeated. "Got any hobbies?"

"I'm not sure I can trust you not to tell anyone my answer."

"What? It can't be that bad. What is it? Masturbating? Watching porn? Fantasizing about other women?" I stopped myself right there. I just named three things that all involved sex. If I didn't stop, I would probably ask something stupid, like, "Is Katniss amazing when you fuck her?"

"Actually, it's worse…promise not to tell?"

"Yeah. What happens in the woods, stays in the woods."

After a long, thoughtful pause, Gale told me. "I like ribbon dancing and playing with ponies." He immediately looked away, ashamed. He must have seen the astonished look on my face.

"Are you serious?" I responded. "I _love_ ribbon dancing! In fact, you wanna dance right now?"

"Of course! Finally, I have a partner!" I pulled two long ribbons out of my pocket (don't even ask why I had them with me, because I have no clue). Handing one to Gale, we began to dance.

_Gale's point of view_

I took a ribbon and began to dance. Looking at him, he obviously practiced a lot. The bread boy was a lot better than me. To an outsider, we probably looked like a bunch of stupid fairies prancing around in circles. Still, we laughed and danced our hearts out, until I fell.

Blinded by this blissful feeling, I didn't even notice the rock sticking out of the ground. I tripped and fell forward – right on top of Peeta. Our lips touched accidently, yet I kept mine interlocked with his. Before I knew it, we were making out.

It was an amazing experience. The kissing soon turned into grinding, and I felt his boner rubbing against mine. Then, we ripped off our shirts, feeling the warmth of each other's chest as we kissed. My breathing became short, rapid breaths that I couldn't control. Soon, our pants were off and I saw his penis.

Peeta sat me on a rock, so he could suck on my dick. It felt even better from when Katniss did it. I couldn't help moaning in pleasure. He was good.

After a while of that, I bent him over, shoving my penis up his ass. He could not contain his excitement. "Oh, Gale! Oh, you're amazing! Oh, oh my – OH MY GOD! Oh! Holy shit, you're good! Oh, sweet mother of – oh, GALE!"

Switching positions, Peeta stuck his dick inside of me. I never knew dude-on-dude sex could feel so…so…AMAZING! "Oh my God! PEEEEETAAA! Holy mother fucker! Oh, my! Oh _God,_ Peeta!"

_Peeta's point of view_

Don't ask me how I felt about having sex with Gale. You can tell he was fucking amazing and that I loved it by my reaction to it. And trust me – I did NOT expect this to happen in my attempt to befriend Gale.

_Katniss's point of view_

I grabbed the deer I killed and began to drag it back home. My surprise for Gale was to make him deer stew, then show him a few tricks I didn't show him earlier. It was then that I heard the screams.

"Oh, Peeta! Oh, Gale! Peeta! Oh, God! Gale! PEETA! Holy crap, you're _fucking_ amazing!"

I dropped the deer and ran – only to find my husband fucking my worst enemy.

"GALE!" I cried. Tears began to flow from my eyes. "How_ could_ you? You…you _loved_ me!" My sadness turned to anger at the sight of Peeta.

"Katniss!" Gale shouted, obviously startled. "It's not what it looks like!" Peeta and Gale hurriedly began to redress.

"Die, Peeta!" I bellowed, ignoring my naked husband. "You stupid mother _fucking_ WHORE! DIE YOU HOMEWRECKER!" I picked up my bow and arrow and shot Peeta in the eye.

I didn't care whether or not that bitch was dead; I picked up a knife I found on the ground and pounced on him. Stabbing him repeatedly, I shouted random curse-words, half-words, and non-words to release my fury.

_Gale's point of view_

"Holy shit! Katniss! STOP IT!" I screamed. She was killing the only man I ever had sex with! (Don't judge me) I leaped on her and snatched the knife out of her hands. Then, blinded by my rage, I stabbed her in the neck.

Shaking, I backed away from the bloody mess I had created. "NOOOOO! Peeta! Katniss! Why?" Why did I kill my wife and this amazing male lover? Bawling, I sat on top of them. Then, I took the knife and lifted it to my chest. I was the one who started this mess, so I was going to end it. "I'm so sorry," I whispered to the corpses. I laid my body down in the heap of skin, bone, and blood, and sunk the blade deep into my flesh. I let out one final scream as the knife tore into my heart:

"I LOVE YOU KATNISS AND PEETA!"

_**Author's Note***_

_The title of this story was created by my BFFL :)_


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